Commitment issues

Memory of carrying you

home under the stars

that barely showed through

the pollution of the city’s sky

Heaven hung just out of reach

that night, I think that was when

I officially began to lose my mind

This is the first time I haven’t had

to think “what if they don’t make it to my next birthday?”

Instead, I’m busy worrying about myself

slowly dying in the shower since

I banned myself from the local bar

that I went to after deciding against your arms